The meal to the left there might look like something that was struck by an improvised explosive device, and it is fair to say it's not exactly photogenic. But it's like sex in that respect; you can kill the hotness by trying to make it look good and commercial porn is proof of that particular pudding. We make this dish once a week and I can honestly report that this is possibly the most spectacularly ugly version I can remember, I think because we skimped on the eggs this time round. Never mind.
I call this Half-Basque Eggs in honour of a friend (the semi-Iberian/Euskal element) who returned from a trip to his maternally ancestral Navarre mumbling fervently about... this local traditional thing, with um eggs, and all this other good shit that was fucking delicious... without being able to specify much else because hrmmmph no cook just eat: manbrain. He was trapped in the memory of that goodness and could not articulate its particulars.
Luckily I knew that good shit in this instance meant fried/roasted/protein; I have incorporated those and the rest is highly expedient experimental appropriation resulting in this cobbled-together inauthentic rendition of something I have never really experienced in its true form. But don't let that put you off. It is fucking delicious.
I call this Half-Basque Eggs in honour of a friend (the semi-Iberian/Euskal element) who returned from a trip to his maternally ancestral Navarre mumbling fervently about... this local traditional thing, with um eggs, and all this other good shit that was fucking delicious... without being able to specify much else because hrmmmph no cook just eat: manbrain. He was trapped in the memory of that goodness and could not articulate its particulars.
Luckily I knew that good shit in this instance meant fried/roasted/protein; I have incorporated those and the rest is highly expedient experimental appropriation resulting in this cobbled-together inauthentic rendition of something I have never really experienced in its true form. But don't let that put you off. It is fucking delicious.
The really great thing about this Basque Eggs is its endlessly accommodating nature. All you need are 5-6 eggs and whatever you've got lying around. It can be fancy and full of expensive impressiveness i.e. exotic mushrooms and awesome charcuterie, and you could cook it in those egg ring things to attain discrete, presentable portions. It can also be a dumping ground for 3-day old leftovers you wouldn't eat any other way. Today we are taking the middle Way.
Another attraction of egg things like these are their omnichoronological appropriateness. Any given sliver of the day or night is Half-Basque Eggs time. The meat-free version, especially with roasted vegetables, is perfectly satisfying and delicious. It can be as unprocessed, Paleo and low carb as you like. All that and it reheats without prejudice when you make too much.
Another attraction of egg things like these are their omnichoronological appropriateness. Any given sliver of the day or night is Half-Basque Eggs time. The meat-free version, especially with roasted vegetables, is perfectly satisfying and delicious. It can be as unprocessed, Paleo and low carb as you like. All that and it reheats without prejudice when you make too much.
 | W H A T Y O U ' L L N E E D - 5 to 7 Free-range eggs, depending on size. - Olive oil - Smoked paprika, pepper, salt - Your preferred herbs - A vegetable medley; today we use tinned three-bean mix, zucchini, leeks, mushrooms, kale/spinach/silverbeet and leftover roast root veg, but you do you. - Your choice of protein. We've got a nice dry chorizo but any sausage or smoked fish is nice. |
 | < Chop all your ingredients, including herbs, into chunks, except the sausage which is best sliced finely. Set aside. In your largest frying pan, bring a bit of butter and olive oil and cracked pepper to a fairly high heat and fry the stuff that needs to be cooked or browned; the meat, and any mushrooms and onions etc. |
| > While this is happening, mix all the eggs in a bowl with pepper, paprika and a bit of salt. No need to aerate- just combine robustly.  |  |
^ Drain your beans or whatever canned stuff you're using. Withhold any leafy veg, but add the other greener ingredients to the pan and give them a bit of a brown once the meat and mushrooms are caramelised. By comprehensively frying everything that will take a bit of colour, you're ensuring depth of flavour.
 > Add the green leafy vegetables and stir through carefully. No matter how carefully you stir, it will now become apparent that your pan is too fucking small for the amount of food you're trying to prepare. You can learn from our mistake. We never really do. | < Turn down the heat and pour your raw spiced eggs into the frying pan slowly. Or quickly. Whatever.  |
Toss in a bit more olive oil and pepper. Turn the heat up a wee bit until you can see the eggs beginning to solidify, but it's important to keep everything moving so nothing sticks too badly to the bottom. It will probably stick a little bit unless you have one of those next-level pans, but the worst of it gets sweated off in the cooking process so don't panic. Keep heating and turning it over until you start to get browned looking bits of scrambly egg as per the lower right image. We like our eggs hard so we keep going til it's all a bit rubbery, but you can stop when you see the kind of result you prefer.
| Plate up with some bread if you like, but this is a substantial meal in itself and additional starch isn't necessary. This amount serves four polite adults or two greedy ones with leftovers.  |  |
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