I swear we were not responsible for this jeu d'esprit (pictured above) inscribed on a road guard on the way to Sawyer's Bay and I do not necessarily endorse the sentiment, except in exchange for jewellery and/or the prospect of social advancement.
| Ha ha! Only half-joking! But in all seriousness, I do think more penises should find their way into a greater selection of mouths and perhaps spend more time there as a general principle. We're all sick of hearing from idle mouths, and an idle penis is the devil's plaything. Buttplug, probably, if christians are to be believed (they aren't). Or perhaps we should pair this contentious organ with a more contemporary menace and say a bored cock is the devil's iPhone; I feel okay saying that out loud since I don't think Apple and Satan are exactly on the DL anymore. They're out and proud. Anyway. Do you love that there is a boat called African Quail > as much as we do? Let's take in a few of the Port scenes we've snapped recently with the wee pocket Canon while I complain to you about rubbish television. We stayed in this All Hallows eve and exposed ourselves to the first series of The Walking Dead, largely because I was tired of hearing about it in absentia. |  |
If nothing else, it reminded us why we're not fans of the zombie horde scenario. Its intrinsic limitations are so difficult to write around, especially in a sustained manner. For one, there's the backstory issue- in my humble opinion, you should either go hard, creative and compelling with the particulars of your disaster, or don't bother explaining at all. Nada. Just keep it zipped. Anything in between, as per TWD, is just rank, stinky expediency. Then there's the general high v low-functioning conundrum; zombies must always be dumber than your survivors, so in order to present median, broadly relatable (lol euphemisms) characters, you have to relegate anyone exceptional or interesting and grind your situational parameters hard into the dirt, resulting in dipshit protagonists and a really static, window-licking horde. Which then means you then have to stunt like a drunk clown to keep all those sludgy elements moving. Do you love an almost total reliance on deus ex machina? We hate that shit.
 | So after someone shot a kid we didn't care about through a deer we really liked early on in Season 2, we hit the kill switch in a welter of boredom and general irritation. Maybe it gets better, but the fundamentals were just too fucking annoying. Verdict: The Walking Dead is boring. Visually budget. Repetitive (in a bad way) even within the first series. And heaving with survivors we couldn't give a rat's arse about. That's another fatal problem with the zombie scenario. It requires us to make the increasingly pointless distinction between the deadened living and the living dead. In a world already stuffed to the gills with grunting, shuffling oxygen thieves, what's the point of a viral apocalypse? Personally, I could see myself seizing a weapon and going violently collateral five seconds after the first person complained about phone reception. Come on now- what's the first and/or only thing a standard suburban twat would miss? Not their fucking photo albums. In trying to dignify its dishwater survivors (and thereby flatter its audience), The Walking Dead is wilfully stupid and laughably dishonest. I know it's just a zombie yarn but we both know it wants to be taken seriously so yeah- they should have tried harder. |
(A side note to oversensitives- TWD gave me a dose of horrid, persistent synaesthetic psycho-murk that's hanging around like an olive green algal bloom stuck to the inside of my skin. You might want to avoid it altogether if you're susceptible.)
Onsite this week- proooobably something local and scenic. Unless I have a better idea between now and Wednesday. You'll be the first to know.
* I've just noticed that some of the translation links in the onsite Book had dropped out so I've been through and reinstated them all. Please feel free to let me know if you find bung links. I apologise on behalf of the recent updates.*
Onsite this week- proooobably something local and scenic. Unless I have a better idea between now and Wednesday. You'll be the first to know.
* I've just noticed that some of the translation links in the onsite Book had dropped out so I've been through and reinstated them all. Please feel free to let me know if you find bung links. I apologise on behalf of the recent updates.*
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